Archive for the Heparin Installments Category

#3

Posted in Heparin Installments on January 18, 2008 by icangel

Well, I don’t want to say the way the first installment made me feel was some kind of fluke, but it sure seems that way.  When my Dr came into the room today and asked me how I felt, I could see that he expected me to say-not very well- Like there is a pattern to these that he just hasn’t told me about.  He told me he’s not sure why the first one made me feel so good.  I may chalk it up to psychosomatics.  I think I just wanted it so badly that my brain refused to accept the pain signals my bladder sent.   I have after-all used that power of my brains persuasion to get into a sort of remission.  I used to go into them every other week when I was receiving my native American healing.  Because I’m so spiritual,  I will never say that there aren’t people in the world who can harvest the ancient healing energy our ancestors once used.  But I also cant discount the power of the brains persuasion.  But more on the mind, body and spirit connection later, back to my installation…

So, as I said, I have been feeling not quite my usual self.   I always have a tolerable burning pain in my abdomen even through the medication.  After all, opioid will never eliminate all the pain, only make it tolerable.  And I will admit the reason for these installations was because I seemed to be having flares everyday. But having a cath inserted through my urethra and into my bladder produces a pain when the lidocane wears off, that makes me want to scream foe mercy.  Over dramatic? I wish.  It doesn’t help that my DR, although compassionate has decided to make me his cath guinea pig…using the big one instead of the smaller one.  “lets see if she feels the difference between the thicker and thin one” Now, it is true that I usually dont mind exploring the truth and myths in what people say, especially when it comes to my own medical condition and beliefs, but when it comes to my urethra, if not just for the sake of fooling myself, give me the smallest cath you can find!  And because I;m going to pretend its all the caths fault as to why I’m feeling this way, I’m going to say there is a difference.  Hence why my first one(the pediatric cath) didn’t leave me in the same pain. 

But this one was definitely more uncomfortable than the first.  I had muscle spasms on my 30 minute drive home.  But once I did get home and turned to my best friend, the heating pad, things definitely calmed down.  I think I did find the secret to holding in the heparin for an astounding amount of time.  I usually schedule my appointment  right before or after  my med  time.  But I always save my breakthrough pain medication for after.  Today I went early to my app and had to wait 2 1/2 hours to take it! But it worked out perfectly.  Although at times it was painful to say the least I did everything I could do to hold it in on my own.  Which usually means logging onto the Internet and looking up anything that could distract me.   I just took it every 20 minuets, telling myself I would void at 2, then 2:20 and so on.  Until I could take my mediation.  Once I took it the pain subsided a bit and I held it forabout hour.  Then I took my breakthrough medication and held it for another hour…and by the time 6pm rolled around I had gone 4 1/2 hrs! Granted by the time I voided I felt like my bladder was going to come out with it.  But that pain subsided after about 10 minutes and didn’t re appear until almost 9pm. 

So for me that is the secret, hold it myself until I go mad and then sooth it with my meds.  Not taking it right before or after.  Unfortunately things did feel the same this morning as they have since the second day of my first treatment, but I’m trying to keep a good attitude in that its only my third one.  My doc days he wants to do 6 in a row.  I don’t know what happens after that, but I’m halfway through.  And I’ve decided that I will disregard his notion of impossibility, being unable to hold it in for 8 hours. He has to know once you tell someone somethings not possible, there thought eventually turns to beating the odds.  after all, 4 1/2 hours is a little more than half way.  And even if these don’t work(which I’m refusing to beieve right now) accomplishing some sort of goal you set for yourself has to count for something.  Even if I can never do it, when you have IC setting a goal, even if it seems ridiculous to others, is 1/2 the battle won!

Thank God for my pain management Dr!!! 

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darn…

Posted in Heparin Installments on January 16, 2008 by icangel

well the heparin is out.  I couldnt hold it for as long today.  2 hours.  I am surprised that the pain has escalated since I voided.  After my first one it took almost 24 hours for my pain to get to this point. 

It is only my second treatment so I’m trying not expect anything, even once I have a few months of them.  Its just a little disapointing to have to take another breakthrough pill.  I am counting down the days until I get to do this at home so I can have all the lidocane I want.  It is soooo soothing. 

Heparin Installment #2

Posted in Heparin Installments on January 16, 2008 by icangel

The 2 days after my initial treatment were hell.  I could definitely tell I had been cathed.  But although there was pain, it was not pain which spread.  The fact that it stayed in particular spots was actually a relief.

I was excited to go for my second treatment, but not using my brain I stopped off in he bathroom before going into the office.  Needless to say I basically lit my urethra on fire before I even had to be cathed! I suddenly realized they could have taken it out without having to feel the burn and wanted to hit my head against the wall. 

This time I waited forever, just when I changed my mind about going through this again my Doc walked in.  His timing always impeccable.  He must be psychic…

I tried to make small talk as he injected the lido-cane in but realized it was so uncomfortable that I no longer even heard what I was saying.  I hope I was making  some sense! The cath did hurt, almost more than the first time.  But I felt like it went quicker and I managed to keep my cries in my own head.  This time I got to see the heparin flow from the bottle into the cath.  I was surprised how fast it went. 

I felt a little more pain when he pulled the cath out, but that lidocane really does its job so didn’t want to fall to the floor in the fetal position, so thumbs up on that!

He told me we were going to do six in a row.  I don’t know what happens after those six, but I hope there is some improvement even if minimal.  I was so proud of holding it in for 3 hours last time( even if I took a little extra help in the form of a pill, its still an achievement in my book) that I told him I was going to try for longer and longer.  He burst my bubble telling me it was impossible for me to hold it for the length I was shooting for…8 hours.  There goes that little game I play that makes it more tolerable.  But as I type it is becoming harder to hold it. My bladder is not happy and its certainly letting me know.  Its been two hours, still not bad…

Well see how it effects me tomorrow.  It can only go up from here and at the very worst stay the same. 

My 1st Installment

Posted in Heparin Installments on January 12, 2008 by icangel

The wait was long, its always long.  And the immediate benefits of my extended release medication were balancing out.  I almost wanted to ask to lay down.  Evert time I am forced to sit in a Dr.’s waiting room I wonder why they don’t have a few seats that are intended for people in my situation.  Big comfy ones that allow you to sink into them.  I guess there reserved for the Dr.’s personal office.

When my name was finally called  The nurse showed me to my exam Room and told me to undress from the waist down and the Dr would be in soon.  Oh, no…another wait. I absolutely love my Urologist but like most Dr.’s he’s always running behind.  I remember once waiting for an hour in the waiting room and another 50 minutes in the exam room.  That’s enough to frustrate even the most patient of people. 

When I was alone, I took the time to check out all the torcher tools they would be using on me.  The catheter seemed thicker than I thought it would be, and remembered the information I found in my Internet search,  explaining that IC patients may find the smallest catheter more tolerable.  I made sure that the nurse replaced the monstrous one with the smallest one they had.  My Dr. came in 5 minutes later and waisted no time.  He began by injecting(without the use of a needle)Lido-cane into my urethra.  I braced myself, bt quickly realized it wasn’t so bad.  The lido-cane seemed to work pretty quickly and the cool gel was soothing to my urethra.  Now why don’t they ever give us IC patients an endless supply of that stuff? 

My uro showed me the amount of Heparin they were going to install and said there were probably going to take more urine out than medicine in.  To me it looked just shy of 1/4 cup.  When he warned me he was going to start inserting the cath, I braced myself.  I quickly realized that the lido-cane whch soothed my bladder didn’t completely numb it out.  I felt like I could feel every inch it progressed until it hit my bladder.   My thoughts turned to how I was ever going to be able to cath myself at home.  But at least for now that part was over, and the nurse began collecting the urine I had in my bladder.  Which I have to say was nice for once not to pass the acidic urine through my urethra. That one benefit of Cathing myself may out weigh the pain of putting it in. I wish it felt that way all the time. 

When she reached the bottom of my bladder it did have a little sting, but felt more strange than anything.  My uro quickly installed the Heparin and lidocane and pulled the cath out.  He told me I seemed to tolerate the medicine and process enough to come in and get them as often as possible.  And although mt urethra burned and felt raw, I agreed.  He told me to hold it in for as long as possible and void it when I felt I had reached my limit.  I knew I had a 40 minute ride home and hoped I could make it. 

Well not only was I able to make it home without letting it go, with a little help from some extra medication I held it for 3 hours! It burned terribly to void it out and despite my extra help the familiar pain of the past two years returned moments later. But All in all I’d have to say it was a successful experience and hope that I fall into the 50% of those who eventually experience  a huge reduction in symptoms and pain.  Awaiting my 2nd…